Tuesday 5 April 2011

Are we alone?

It's a hard and thankless task being an agony aunt.  I often get letters and emails accusing me of fabricating the whole thing. The cheek of it! Well, anyone that says that hasn't met your average free-flier. Never in my life have I come across such a bunch of eccentric and whimsical beings. Talking of which I received this letter in the post yesterday. I tell you - you just couldn't make it up!

Dear Doreen
I had another strange experience last weekend. It was a beautiful day and thermals were popping over the Malvern Hills. I got a corker and took it over the back as I was screaming up to cloudbase. Eventually I went into cloud. I was pulling big ears, big feet, big everything but still I was rocketing upwards. Just as I was thinking of pulling big elbows I became aware of a bright light surrounding me and some strange music that was going doo dee dee dah dah like on that film in the 80s. Then my glider started to spin around and around and I seemed to be trapped in some kind of pink bubble and I could see all these strange faces - a bit like Amy Winehouse - staring through the bubble at me and then it all went blank. The next thing I knew I was dangling from a tree in a field near Tregaron with a sore bottom - although that may have been from the bit of tree that I hit- and the words Alpha Centauri  going round my head. Why does it always happen to me?
Do you think I should claim it as an XC? I make it about 106km so it would be worth claiming for the XC league don't you think?

Eternally yours,  Achilles Pushenvolope

Dear Achilles
I think you should but don't  be tempted to enter an out and return - I don't think the people at XC league use light years as a measurement.
I hope this helps, Doreen 

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